Why I Believe

"If I'd abandon all that seeks to make my faith informed and chic, could You, would You, show Yourself to me?" ~ Nichole Nordeman

When I first read this quote, I wasn't sure what it meant. Even after reading the entire song, I still wasn't sure if I had anything of value to add this week. After spending most of the evening and night last night feeling pretty sick, I decided I would just skip this week. Then this afternoon, I decided to look at it one more time and see if anything came to me. Call me crazy, attribute it to OCD, whatever... but I felt bad skipping a week, especially since I just joined in on this. *smile*

It finally dawned on me that this quote sort of represents the last several years of my life. I was raised a Christian, in a Christian home, with God fearing parents. We only missed church when we were sick. I even went to a Christian school for my high school years. So everywhere I turned, there was God. I grew up believing the same things my parents believed. I took everything our pastors would say as truth. I took my faith in God for granted. It was my life, of COURSE I believed it all. Right?

It wasn't until a while after I married that I realized I knew what I believed, I just didn't really know why I believed it. I mean, obviously, I believed it because it was how I was raised. But why? I was extremely close minded and approached the Word with preconceived ideas. It wasn't until I sought to shed those ideas and approach His Word with an open mind and heart that He truly began to reveal Himself to me, precious facets of Himself that can just blow your mind. My beliefs didn't change so much... at least not in the big things that matter. But rather I started to see why I believed what I did (other than just being taught that way my entire life), and why His Word is the only truth. It was at that point that I ceased to be a follower of man, making my faith be whatever information people gave me - whatever was "chic" and right to them, and instead became a real follower of Christ.

Don't get me wrong. I was saved as a child, and I still believe to this day I was saved as a child. I understood what I was taught, I just didn't understand all the whys. My knowledge of God was very surface level. My relationship with Him was there and real, but it wasn't something extremely deep that I constantly pursued. I didn't have the deep desire to grab on to His coattails and hang on for dear life. The switch was on, but the light was dimmed by the thickness of my selfishness, stubbornness, and preconceived ideas. It took growing up and getting out on my own, and being tested in my beliefs for me to see God revealing Himself as I firmly planted my feet on the ground of those beliefs for the right reasons.

I hope that makes sense. If not, blame my migraine and OCD. *smile*

Don't forget to visit Fruit in Season, this week's host, and read her thoughts on the quote. :o)